TPI Reports

So in case anyone who reads Joey's blog was wondering about my medical clearance, I still don't have it.  After all those trips to the Iowa Clinic (see earlier post), the government is not satisfied.  The first urinalysis had a trace of blood and so did the second (which is totally normal in runners as running on an empty bladder causes slight friction and seeing as I run almost every day it would make sense to find blood), so they required a cytology and visit to a urologist.  So after I peed the third time and the report revealed that (gasp!) everything was fine, I don't have cancer and there is nothing unusual, I was able to cancel my visit to the urologist (thank GOD). 
Unfortunately, the cytology report isn't enough to explain away that box I checked for depression.  Ugh Why Did I Do That?!?!  For future reference, for anyone who has to fill out government forms, lie lie lie lie lie.  If you are honest when you fill out the forms you are creating a world of pain for yourself.  So first they sent a TPI report.  Yes, for all of you Office Space fans, it is really called a TPI report.  We asked our friend Michon, who is the PA at Preventative Health (the clinic we used to have an interest in), if she would fill out the form for me.  Which is no easy task, by the way.  This freaking form is about twenty questions, each one of them dumber than the previous, about my treatment and diagnosis and support system and give me a freaking break.  At the bottom of the form it asks that the answers be put in narrative form and submitted to the government.  Well, the nurse from the State Dept contacted Joey and asked that I call her.  Apparently, even though it says so on the form, they do not want a narrative, they want the TPI report.  And they want it from every doctor, psychiatrist, psychologist and therapist I have seen in the last ten years for my depression.  I told her A) I do not have depression anymore B) I know how to handle it (avoid annoying people like her) C) It was caused by growing up, I feel good about myself, am not on medication, love to run and do yoga and I haven't seen a doctor for it in over a year so I'm not sure how the information they provide would be relevant.  Her answer?  "I really need those TPI reports."  OMG!  She just said that the nurses try to collect as much information as they can to get everything ready for the providers who make the decision.  I told her that it's going to take time to get into the doctor and then it's going to cost money because we have a high deductible plan and she just said, sorry that's they way it is and then she told me she'd email me the TPI reports again. 

I called the Iowa Clinic for my records - I have to come in and sign a release and then it will be 7-10 days for their Medical Records department to get them to me.

Oh the frustration!