to "FML Moments." I thought I'd share one from today.
Our suitcase collection needed some updating. It consisted of several carry-on approved size suitcases (about 20"); one ten year-old, regular size suitcase that begs to be thrown away, as it has been all over Europe and the Western Hemisphere several times and looks that way, with its now gaping hole in the corner; and one gigantic, human-sized suitcase. So today I took it upon myself to visit several stores to find some sturdy, functional luggage at a minimal price to safely transport many of our belongings to Abuja. I ended up purchasing four suitcases at Marshall's, which my husband hasn't even seen but has already informed me two of which are considered oversized. I bought a pink set of three: 28", 25", and 20", as well as another 28" in black. So who knows the big black one will probably have to go back (I thought I was replacing the regular-sized one), but that's not even the point of my story. Just a tertiary FML. Anyway, I nested together the set of three suitcases and put them in the back of my car.
So on Sunday night, after dropping Lauren off at the airport, Joey and I made another trip to Costco. Our cart was so full and so heavy it took both of us to move it, and at least fifteen minutes to load into the trunk and back seat of our car. Sunday was also the first day of some rather pleasant weather we've been having here. Apparently the average in DC in December is 50 degrees, but lucky for us, the temperature is hovering around 35, with a wind chill of 25. So after freezing our asses off in the parking lot of Costco, Joey and I were loathe to do it again in our little parking lot (not to mention the dogs were howling and its a pain to shuffle everything back and forth). We decided to at least unload the back of the car, as our alley can get a little shady in the dark and we didn't want to provide any incentive to break in (not that three gallon bins of olive oil and cans of diced tomatoes incite me to break in cars but you never know). So we left the trunk full of food.
I had this brilliant idea that I would take the food and put it in the new suitcase. In the parking lot of Marshall's. Which was full of holiday traffic...Turns out not all of the food in the trunk fit in the suitcase (duh). And so then the suitcase wouldn't fit in the trunk. Which meant it had to go in the front seat. Now you know how the doors on two-door cars swing pretty heavily? So I'm trying to avoid dinging the car next to mine which means I can't open the door too far. And now I've loaded this 28" suitcase full of jars of roasted red peppers, kalamata olives, honey, artichokes, as well as 7 - 2.5 lb bags of coffee beans and 2 - 6 lb bags of chocolate chips. And its freaking heavy. I can barely pick the thing up off the ground to roll over to the door and then lifting it into my car? Not happening. So I roll the suitcase back to the trunk where I unload half of it. I figured taking out the 27 pounds of coffee and chocolate would make it light enough to pick up. Nope. Defeated, I unload the entire suitcase back into my trunk, pick up the suitcase, put it in my front seat, and drive home. FML.
